Pooey

Addis, like pretty every much capital city attracts migrant workers. I interviewd quite a few, and many were obvious in their appearance. Two young women applying had  oil black teeth; and one so black it looked like she had no teeth at all. I feared they might scare my gorgeous Pre – KG kids.

Nonetheless, i have employed a couple of country-bumpkins, one as a class teacher and one recently as an Educational Assistant in Upper Primary. But they have both body odour issues.

Aged Rasta returnee Mrs R explains that it is a commonly held belief that deodorants and antiperspirants are cancer causing. The ventilation in our classrooms are very poor and the impact can be stifling and retch inducing during our hot days. I have sorted the class teacher and now it’s time for our EA. Never a comfortable meeting to address, but it has to be done.

News From The Top

reptilian Dr. No - the ultimate nemesis

The Top Management Team (Ato S (Founder), Ginger Warrior (Head of Secondary) and Mountain Man have been meeting daily to completely reorganise and restructure the school.   Sub-human Dr. No (Deputy General Manager) is called in daily to answer questions and justify his existence.

Ato S leads the onslaught as we run through all Senior Management Team meeting. Dr No is clearly a liar, and is guilty of mismanagement and creating bottlenecks to thwart the development of the school.

Dr No clasps his head in his hands rocking back and forth as he squirms at the barrage of questions. By Wednesday i have had enough and i go for the jugular. As we all gather i request that there is something i need to share before we proceed with our agenda.

“We are an educational institution which should be devoid of lies and deceit. Most especially at Senior Management level. And yet it is very clear that one member of the team has not only acted deceiptfully, but openly lied. I cannot and will not work like this. This is just completely Mickey Mouse and is just completely wrong”.

Dr No furiously collects his files off the table, mumbles something in Amharic  and heads for the door. Ato S. Translates “I don’t need this. I just want some peace”. Ginger Warrior is gobsmacked but cannot hide his delight at this monumental moment. His face beams across the table at me in sheer glee.

But Ato S runs after him and persuades him back into the meeting. He lightly abmonishes me and says he trusts Dr No and says it’s important that we avoid “untruths”. I am thoroughly disappointed in Ato S. He might not want us to sack Dr No – they go back a long way, but at least let the complete tool walk and do the school a massive favour. But at least i know i can make thise complete twat walk.

The Top Management Team meetings continue throughout the next week.

I am not prepared to sign my contract, and the school will have to accept this or release me. I have a clear agenda.

• To bring financial transparency
• To increase salaries and ensure a pay-scale is adhered to
• To bring in performance realated pay based on appraisal of all
• To ensure Admin is under Academics
• To find an honest and well organised Head of Admin that can appraise staff and bring them to accountability
• To have Boss sidelined to an advisory position only and not allowed to attend Senior Management meetings 
• I never want to see Dr No again 

Bon Appetite

The closest i have to a routine in Addis are my Saturdays. I go into work around 9 and work through to lunchtime. Ms J is equally as passionate about education as i am, and she often brings her two lovely youngest daughters to school to hang, and if very lucky, they can surf The Net.

Quality English friends, Rob and Anna come by the school and its time for lunch.

Addis has a wide selection of quality and international restaurants dotted around the city, and each week, we take turns in selecting different mid-price venues. I am putting together a good restaurant guide of the city for the visiting gastronome.

The last two Sundays however, Addis has been enjoying two international food fairs and i’ve been woofing down delights from India, Greece, Turkey, Austria, Indonesia and Thai.

The Taste of Addis last week is held every six months. Set in the beautiful gardens behind Paradise the place is packed over the course of the weekend, with local entertainment including live music, dancing and acrobats.

hula-hoop girl

The swanky Diplomatic Bizarre is annually held at Millennium Plaza in Bole. Addis is home to the African union and there are some 125 consulates and embassies in the city. This a gathering for the Addis elite and not surprisingly there are plenty of my kids walking around with their parents. 

There are plenty of stalls to purchase food and handicrafts, but everything is expensive and seriously overpriced. I resist the textiles (Birr 300 – Birr 750) despite my desire to cover the vomit-inducing settees, but i simply can’t resist the Parmesan and Swiss chocolates.

Entertainment is provided by local Addis artists including Hanni, Kenny Allen and Vahe. Ms J’s oldest, Jason, is a radio DJ at Afro AM – Addis’ only English radio station knows all these guys, and they all know Ms J, and i get personal introductions to almost all.   

Infestation

Ginger Warrior had a major roach problem. Walking down to the kitchen in the dark was certainly never recommended. With two small children to boot, GW wants rid of these pests. He is recommended by all and sundry to use  a special chalk. But GW insists it is totally ineffectual against this infestation. Over the half term break he is returning with his family to Nairobi, and he requests that a pest control company come round to blitz them, kindly facilitated by Dr No.

They do show up and let in by Rob and Anna. They’re informed not to re-enter the house for 48 hours. The entire house and compound stinks and the floor is littered with roach bodies, not all of which are completely dead. Rob and Anna tell Dr No to send one of the school cleaners around to tidy up. He refuses. Rob and Anna are insistent. And all the food that had been in the kitchen has to be put back in. They beg, they plead and eventually Dr No aquieses.

But whoever they did send round was clearly ineffectual, and GW and fam return to what can only be described as complete carnage. And the house still reeks. GW is concerned. He calls Dr No and asks him to check what chemical was used. He refuses to do so, but offers Ginger Warrior the telephone number. “They speak English” Dr No insists. GW calls, but they don’t speak any English whatsoever. GW is insistent that Dr No calls. Which he does some three days later. Google-ing the chemical it transpires it has been banned in the EEC 18 years ago as “highly toxic and carcinogenic”. His youngest is two and a half. Despite my best efforts, Health and Safety remains low priority at the school.    

It takes almost a week to scrub down the house, all the food had to be thrown out, and Ginger Warrior and Jules and nonplussed. 

A Reluctant King

The closest translation from my Cantonese name is King of the Mountains. How prophetic – suddenly Mountain Man seems to have found himself top dog

I bring my bulging file of unfulfilled “Requisite Forms” and my collection of SMT minutes, with waiting actions by Dr No highlighted in florescent pink. Fluorescent green highlights actions over-turned either by Boss, Dr No or by both. With no authority whatsoever. I let Ato S know this is all too Mickey Mouse, and i am at my wits end. I will not continue to battle for scraps – it’s a complete waste of my time. My unsigned contract allows me to walk by the 1^st of December.   Ato S is visibly shocked and  scared.

Ginger Warrior then joins the meeting and lists a host of examples of lies, deceit and examples of incompetence. It flows continually. Ato S says he will help us but we need to help him. Mine especially, for i am the only experienced Director on SMT. My wish his his command and he tells me repeated how much he is looking forward to learning from me.

Then and there he completely decides to take over the day to day running of the school. Ginger Warrior, myself and Ato S now form a new level of Senior Management – the Top Management Team. We have the remit to

1. Review every SMT meeting this year to see what remains complete 
2. To rejig the Organogram – to include the stream-lining of SMT (the demotion of Mr A in the first instance, and then side-lining Boss and Dr No from the decision-making process)  
3.  To ensure all outstanding Requisition Forms will be processed immediately

The TMT will meet daily between 10 – 12 daily until the remit is complete. And it looks like it’s gonna take a long time.

Dr No is called in to answer for himself. Also daily.

Every day is amazing to behold. Ato S gives Dr No a complete grilling. I know many readers might think me harsh when i describe him a reptilian, but if you saw him writhe in his chair grasping his bald head in despair and confusion, you would fess i am was right all the time. By day two his lies and deceipt have shone through for all too see, and Ginger Warrior and i shake our heads, audibly tut and mutter “shameful” and “outrageous” intermittently.  

However, it takes me a way from my Primary Site and I have to prepare outside the meeting too. And then there are treats like checking legalities with the school’s lawyer at in the evenings, as well as taking on board an internal union for teachers’ rights and pay and contract issues. Not so good.

I then have to find time to catch up on all my school stuff too. And i feel like an Administrator, and i am so not – i’m an over-qualified international educator who’s passion is for working with my kids.

And, most importantly of all i’m also missing out on my daily hugs and kisses from my kids at pre-snack and and pre-lunchtimes too.

It’s not always good being a King.

You’re the loser i’m afraid as you think i have time for daily postings at the moment? It’s getting real interesting but you’ll just have to wait.